Cow

Funny

This was written by a Law student. Very good idea.

DIVORCE AGREEMENT

THIS IS SO INCREDIBLY WELL PUT AND I CAN HARDLY BELIEVE IT’S BY A YOUNG PERSON, A STUDENT!!! WHATEVER HE RUNS FOR, I’LL VOTE FOR HIM.

Funny!!

Silent Civilian – Rebirth of the Temple

Silent Civilian


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Delete dead links/songs from iTunes

Apple has provided a script to do just this particular trick, and to make use of it you just need to do these things in order:

It will take a little while, but if you have any songs that you have deleted and the dead links are still showing up in iTunes, this is the easiest way to delete them.

Woodchucks Chucking Wood

I think that the woodchuck could chuck as much wood as he wanted! By the way what is a wood chuck? Is it like a gopher? This is difficult to question answer. The amount of wood that woodchucks would chuck on a given day varies greatly with the individual woodchuck. According to a Wall Street Journal article, New York State wildlife expert Richard Thomas found that a woodchuck could chuck around 35 cubic feet of dirt in the course of digging a burrow. Thomas reasoned that if a woodchuck could chuck wood, he would chuck an amount equal to 700 pounds.

The Dark Sucker Theory

The Dark Sucker Theory and the existence of dark suckers prove that dark has mass, is heavier than light, and is faster than light.

First, the basis of the Dark Sucker Theory is that electric bulbs suck dark. For example, take the Dark Sucker in the room you are in. There is much less dark right next to it than there is elsewhere. The larger the Dark Sucker, the greater its capacity to suck dark. Dark Suckers in the parking lot have a much greater capacity to suck dark than the ones in your room.

Rules for Dating my Daughter

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk, you’d better be delivering a package, because you’re sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter’s body, I will remove them.

The First Female Georgian President

The year is 2020 and the United States has just elected the first woman as well as the first female Georgian as president.

A few days after the election the president-elect calls her father and says, So, Daddy, I assume you will be coming to my inauguration?

I don’t think so. Its a 16 hour drive, your mother isn’t as young as she used to be, and my arthritis is acting up again.

Don’t worry about it Daddy, Ill send Air Force One to pick you up and take you home. A limousine will pick you up at your door.